We found the veil…is this the end?

We found finally the veil. Maybe I didn’t want actually to find it. Maybe I just wanted to posticipate. Because this step represented the final piece of a puzzle which will bring you a little bit away from us, in another country, with another family name, with a new love.

Who knows, I guess that sometimes I am really jealous. Because I know that, in a few days, your first thoughts will be for something that goes beyond our family. To your new identity.

Forgive me if I was rude, if I said things I did not mean. It was my mother nature who was calling from inside, trying to send you a message of which I am a little bit ashame: I love you so much, I know it seems strange, I know that if you were already 30 I would love this moment to become real.

The truth is,that I would want you some more only for me.

That I feel those times during which I was holding your hands and driving your moves, making you choose between a Croc’s and a shoe, are so frighteninly gone.

That the only thing I can do now is just to sit down in the car, with the engine switched off and let all the tears come directly from my heart to the surface of my face.

And tell you: I will always love you.

When an address smells of love….

I have a file from the last event I organized. There, some scattered, you can find all the names of those invited five years ago to our party. Name, address, confirmation. There are some people whom are not living in Milan anymore, becuase of their job or their studies. There are some people who moved. And their address is not the same anymore. I was reading the list hoping to find as much useful information as I could. And then suddenly, her name was there. So bright, so sweet, so full of taste of home. So smiling, so embracing, so smelling of tagliatelle with ragù and italian style artichoques. So linked to a past I’ve loved with all my heart. To those rainy milanese Sundays in which we were all forced to go there. Despite your friends, homework, studies and fun. To those difficult days in which the temperature outside was speaking of snow and I used to put all my little children, included the new baby of that period, in my car. Her name is flashing now on my screen. Reminding me that when we have the opportunity to give somebody our love, we don’t have to miss that chance. Nonna Alba, my grandmother is still with us, thanks to G-d. She is living in Israel now and I feel a hole in my heart when I pass in front of her house, here in Milan. Or when I bake the chocolate cake filling the air with the same smell she used to communicate us her love. I don’t need to send her any invitation. Becuase she is on a chair, waiting only for someone to come and kiss her when you happen beside her. I miss her so much. I think I will write her name on an envelope anyway. Just to feel her close to me now, in this precious time, during which I am living one of the most amazing adventures of my life. And just to remember, in any case, how it is important to learn and apreciate every single little detail, as an address written on an invitation envelope, containing the name of those whom you really love.

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